Mother's Act of Contrition
Have you ever went into the confessional to once again confess about a parenting related sin... I have, every single time I have walked into the confessional since I had kids.
My penance was usually to say a Hail Mary for each infraction or each child, but I have always felt like I really wanted to OWN my shortcomings as a parent. Not to beat myself up about it, but to remind me to do better next time.
I just loved coming across this bloggers post from the heartsoverflow.com blog titled:
"A Mothers Act Of Contrition".
Oh my God, I am heartily sorry for all the yelling I did today, for losing my patience more times than I can remember, for rolling my eyes and slamming doors and forgetting that they are just babies and they don't know any better.
I am sorry for failing to be a good partner to my husband for blaming him when my day is difficult as of his day spent with other adults are somehow responsible for my children's terrible naps. And for forgetting that we are in this parenting thing together.
I'm sorry for choosing to do bad, and failing to do good. For being selfish instead of serving, for trying to escape instead of being present, for seeking earthly comforts instead of heavenly treasure.
I know that these things grieve your heart, and I know I don't deserve your mercy.
But I know that you still love me. Because after my child through the most epic tantrum's, and after he spent three minutes in a timeout chair, I want nothing more than to pull him into my arms and say I love you.
In these moments I can see what it must be like for you to love me through all my faults and feelings, nothing my child could do could ever make me love him any less, even though sometimes he makes me want to pull my hair out. I'm so grateful that this is only A shadow of what your love for me must be like.
Help me, with your grace, to start again, O Lord.
Help me, with your grace, to see every hardship as an opportunity to share your cross.
Help me, with your grace, to remember my children are the sheep you have asked me to feed that you have placed in me.
Help me, with your grace, and to give myself to my family, even as you gave yourself for us.
Help me, with your grace, to love the way you love me.